Sarah

This is a story I got from Chicken Soup for teacher's soul. It's really inspiring and in a way, broaden my mind. I hope you enjoy this as much as I do, and I hope you'll be able to gain something from this story.


Sometimes the heart sees what is invisible to the eye. =H. Jackson Brown, Jr.=


I will never forget Sarah. In my eight years as a Head Start teacher, she was my most exceptional student.

One morning, the administrator had called my assistant and me into her office. she told us that we'd be getting a new student- a three-year-old named Sarah. "The girl has been abused," she said. Her father had poured a scalding bucket of hot water down her head, badly burning her neck, back and legs and scalp. She had no hair. Her back and legs would have to be wiped down with oil every few hours so they would not get stiff.

Sarah visited my preschool room the next day for an introductory meeting while the other students were out. Her facial features were petite, and she smiled up at me with innocent brown eyes, startlingly naked because her eyebrows were missing. The back of her bald head was badly scarred down to the neck. She wore a simple white sundress that showed her burnt arms. I seized with anger at the father. The I worried about how the other children would react. I struggled to maintain calm in front of Sarah, her foster mother and my teaching assistant. After Sarah and her mom left, I gave into tears.
"We must prepare the students," my assistant reminded me. "We can't just let her walk in and be made fun of."
"To draw attention to her appearance would single her out," I said. After much discussion, we agreed to have Sarah come in for a half-day on her first day in order to ascertain how the children would react towards her.

The morning Sarah arrived she quietly took a seat. I watched her every second. During playtime, the other children talked to her and shared their toys. They didn't seem to notice that she's different.
"It's dress-up time," One of my students reminded me. Everyday before lunch, they all got to raid the closets and play in a collection of grown-up clothes and fanciful kid's costumes.
"Okay, everyone, let's get started," I agreed.

Sarah followed the other children and put on an Easter bonnet and princess outfit. I tried to smile, but the disparity between the delicate fabric and her scarred skin made me ache for her.

Sarah left for lunch. Her classmates had nap-time and then I led a vocabulary-building lesson. Finally I asked the children, "so how do you all like our new friend Sarah?"
One child answered. "Her hands are small."
"Another added, "She picked the long skirt for dress-up."
Not one mentioned her thick skin or her missing hair. The children's observations helped me realise something very valuable. We teachers saw Sarah as a child who had suffered greatly, a child who needed exceptional handling and assistance. We wanted to hold her, prove to her that not all adults were bad. The children, many of whom had also suffered in some way, saw beyond her scarred appearance. They saw another child, a peer, a new friend.

The next school day, during dress-up, Sarah put on the princess clothes again. She stood in front of a full-length mirror and danced in front of her reflection. "I am beautiful," She murmured o herself.

The confidence of her whirling poses and self-compliment struck me. Here was a child who I thought should be shriveling in self-pity. Instead she was twirling around, having fun. I felt humbled by her inner strength and honored to witness her joy in just being alive. I reached out and embraced her. "Yes, Sarah, you are beautiful."

By Michele Wallace Campanelli

Some people just think...

that being outspoken is really awesome. Well guess again! If you just met someone for the first time, I think it is better for you break the ice first. And by that I don't mean pointing out your weaknesses.

Remember about my fifth pet peeves? Well, I went to the swimming pool today with my cousin and 2 of his colleagues. We've never met before and when we were in the water, one of his friends said this to me: "wow, you're really fat." Stung by the statement, I gave a curt nod and swam off. Later that day, I reported this to my cousin. He said: "well at least he's being honest". Rather hurt by the lack of support, I retort quite aggressively: "He's not being honest, he's being a dick!"

Yes, I AM very sensitive about my weight and I don't like strangers coming to me and point that out. I'm well aware of that, thank you very much! I told my cousin that, "If you don't have a nice thing to say to somebody, you should keep it to yourself". My cousin observed me momentarily and replied:"I see you're not open to criticism".

It felt like he was pouring gasoline onto a raging fire. Although I was quite irritated, I calmly said: "It's not that I'm not open to criticism, It's just that I've been ridiculed countless of times, as far as I'm alive, people just think that calling me fat is like entertainment. They laugh thinking that it's really funny, but they don't know how I feel on the inside."

It's not like I wanted to be this way. Besides, I wouldn't mind if someone criticized me based on my work, I'm confident I have the ability to do better. But in THIS case, I've been trying and trying but I'm still this way. I remember the last 3 months holiday, I made an effort to brisk walk every single day without fail (unless it was raining) but I am still me. The only difference is the increasing number of blisters on my feet. Sometimes I ponder to myself, "aren't people tired of ridiculing others?"

I would like to say, try to be more empathic. Try not to say something hurtful, have more <3...

The things that makes me :)

Here it is... the lists of things that make me think that I'm in heaven haha. Like my previous post, I'll add in 10 things that can make me smile.

Here goes:

Happy list No.1; Coffee! Especially in the morning. Hmmm, smells nice aaaaaaah... Leaving me totally intoxicated. haha

Happy list No.2; Laughing like there's no tomorrow... Of course you'd feel elated. If you laugh but still feel morose, that's just plain scary. haha

Happy list No.3; Going to the bookstore. Just by smelling the new books makes me smile. So whenever I go out, within the country or outside, I'll look for the bookstore. haha

Happy list No.3; Travelling! Traveling is also one of the things that leave me feeling convivial. But with several conditions:

1. I must be accompanied by someone who's really good with directions and map.

2. It's a english/malay/chinese speaking country. I won't say no to Japanese too.

3. I must bring a lot of money. If not, I'll feel insecure.

Happy list No.4; ICE-CREAM! How I wish we can have an ice-cream that's as big as the ones in "cloudy, with a chance of meatball". Just so you know; my favourite's yam and sweet corn. Again, take the hint. haha

Happy list No.5; singing!! I discovered I like singing when I was in a choir group. It felt really good, like you belonged to something. When I become a teacher, I would start a choir club, if there's no choir club in the school. un un...

Happy list No.6; aaaah yes. Painting. I love painting. Although the only thing thats working is your hand but it's quite tiring you know. But the end product reaps, you'll feel like you've achieved something. haha

Happy list No.7; Cloud-gazing... aah when you look up at the sky and observe the different shaped clouds, you'll feel like you're floating and feel like there's no trouble. Try it, I think you can relax better that way. It's really soothing!

Happy list No.9; Fresh bakery... aaaaaah, the smell... I can sniff all day long.

Happy List No.10; Listening to my playlist. Sorry? Did I hear someone say that the picture above is so contradicting? Well, I deliberately chose it. Got a problem with that? Anyhow, Oooh this is really important for me. I usually won't leave home without my ipod/phone. The songs are the best substitute for my friends when I'm alone.

Of course, I would be listening to:

IKIMONO GAKARI!!

So there you go. My top ten list of things that can make me joyful. So what's yours?

10 pet peeves

My good friend Mumui posted something that of interest in her blog. It inspired me to do the same here. In her post, she listed all the 'Things that can make her happy'. What a nice thing to do right? To those who wants to get closer to her should read the post; it's really personal. (^_^)V

Anyhow, instead of doing "the things that can make me happy", I would like to do both; the good and the bad. You know, like ying and yang, light and dark, there are always both good and bad in everything. Well, since I'm a good-news-come-after-bad-news type of person, of course I would do the pet peeves first. lol

So here I go:

Pet-peeves No.1: Being accused for something that I never did... Hate it! haha

Pet-peeves No.2: Overly persuasive people. Especially shopkeepers. Really annoying!

Pet-peeves No.3: Getting lost! uwaaaah...

Pet-peeves No.4: Crowded places! As you all know, I'm quite big. so the chance of me knocking others' shoulder is very high. So I try to avoid crowded places if I can.

Pet-peeves No.5: Being called F.A.T!

Pet-peeves No.6: Dispute... A BIG no no no...

Pet-peeves No.7: Cleaning my room. Well I used to like cleaning but, I grew tired of it. Did you know that it's endless? haha

Pet-peeves No.8: aah Yes, I dislike liar too. Why do you have to lie, huh?

Pet-peeves No.9: Owing someone... It doesn't feel nice. Owh and yes, I detest people who borrows but not returning it too. Get the hint please people. haha

Pet-peeves No.10: I abhor waaaaaiiiiii, wait-for-it, ting. I could be using the time to do something useful right? gosh...

Well, there you go. The top ten pet peeves... Try not to judge me, ayte? Wait for my next post about the things that can make me happy. So, stay tune.

The moral of the story is...

Jangan bagi nama yang bukan-bukan (either real name or nicknames) to your child.

So this is the story of what happened today. My mom and I went to KB town to buy a few things. My mom complained a lot about knee pain (for about a week now), so she went to buy panadol actifast on the counter. I was on her right when she asked for the panadol. But since the panadol was placed next to the counter (not behind the counter, so it's quite difficult for the cashier to reach out for the panadol).

Then my mom said to me: "Yang, ambilkan panadol". But when she said that, she directed it to her left. She thought I was there since there was another guy (wearing the same dark blue shirt) standing there. So, Apa lagi! The guy was really shocked lah when my mom addressed to him. Imagine if there's a woman coming to a guy, saying that she's pregnant and the child's his. Imagine the reaction of the guy. Aaa, sama tah tu udah with the guy tadi ah.

Stammering and eyeing at the girlfriend for help (or perhaps out of guilt? haha). His expression was priceless. He thought my mom called him "yang" bah (short form for sayang = darling). Lucky the shop was half-full. All of us laughed (except the cashier, marung bah; mungkin harus dibedah kali muka atu supaya sentiasa senyum). I would be shocked too if an unknown person called me 'yang' all of a sudden. But he should have known better, manalah ada a mid-age woman panggil ko "sayang" tiba-tiba di public. Mungkin orang atu.... Ish Ish Ish.. haha

Japan, 2009

Tuesday, 9th June

Unfortunate events:

~Came late to the airport (final call sudah) +

~Excess baggage weight (Had to pay $1000 to get it across to Japan) +

~Sensei made a few calls to Japan, saying that I could not make it +

~The Japan side making arrangements for the next day's flight

= Me, feeling Guilty (since I'm representing Brunei,I guessed I did not present well on the first impression)

Wednesday, 10th June and Thursday, 11th June

This time, I was 2 hours early. Baggage was ok about 21.4kg. So, Lucky I made it, (transiting in Singapore) straight to Osaka International airport. Barely slept in the plane and kept on revising the kanji's that was set for placement test later that morning. Reached Osaka around 6.30 in the morning, messaged sensei and my parents the moment my feet touched the ground, to inform I have reached Japan, whole and safe.

My legs in the taxi...

My room! level 8, no. 10. quite spacious, I must say!

First time pakai mask! mau jua digambar kan?

Views outside my room: Tennis court

Nice bustling road, the beach and also the ferris wheel... I wanna go back there.

Our living room

We have a massage chair in the living room. WOW!

My first try on the massage chair.

The first class: Image of Japan

Group 1

Group 2

Group 3: our group (consists of three members me, Rahimah and Ling)

Image on other countries:

Interestingly, most of the people thought that everywhere you go in Brunei, you'll see gold and they said that all people in Brunei are rich because there's oil everywhere. HAHA

Our biker's gang: Sovann and Theara (Cambodia), Rahimah and Helen (Malaysia), and me

Around Tajiri-cho (Tajiri town)

From l->r: Helen (Malaysia), Derek (New Zealand) and Tan (Brunei)

From l-> r: Theara and Sovann (Cambodia) and Ling Min (Malaysia)

Thanks for the memories!

Just last week, I was still considered as a hostel lite but not anymore. Now that I'm back in Kaybee, you can no longer call me a 'bandar-ian' (that's what my cousins called me).

I'm never good with words, in fact, every time i opened my mouth, people usually get hurt or I ended saying something stupid or something that got me into trouble. So, during the last day of my hostel life, I never get to say goodbye to my room. The room that had sheltered me for 4.5 years. With one last fleeting look, I left the room, feeling really miserable. It felt like you are being ran through with a heavily rusted blunt sword and the sword is then being slowly withdrawn. Yes! It felt like that.

M1/30, that's my room. Sorry, forgive me, that WAS my room. Thanks for the memories and thanks for your loyalty. I entrust you to the newer generations of the UBD-ans: please take good care of the room. In order to show how thankful I am to you, I include all the good things that you provided during my stay....

Here goes:

1) You can wake up whenever you want

2) You can sleep whenever you want

3) You can go wherever and whenever you want without asking for permissions.

4) You can hide yourself in the room, whenever you're feeling sad or angry.

5) Good internet connection compared to other parts of the hostel.

6) Very cool during the night

7) Fit just right for one person

8) You don't need to do any chores/ limited chores to do.

9) Minimal distraction such as from parents or from television and what not, so you can focus better in completing your assignments (yea, right!)

10) Great connection networks with friends and neighbors.

Blok M1

Room 30. My room for 4.5 years

My last day in hostel, back in year 2009 before leaving of to Japan

Thank you, thank you! You are forever cherished! :(

Finally! The time hath cometh!

Right! What a tiring day... Been studying kanji (chinese characters) from morning till noon and then started on vocab till 1.00a.m. Congratz! Ani tah hassil org yang procrastinate selalu. so the moral of the story is, never leave the things you can do today till tomorrow. But i never seem to learn that. I wish I'm a workaholic macam sensei.

Speaking of workaholic, there are those days you may feel annoyed with sensei pasal ya jenisnya pemajal. But if you think clearly, dapat ko nampak yang apa ya buat atu, apa yang ya majalkan atu is rasanya kan muridnya kan pandai belajar. really respect that. Pernah kamu ternampak or terdangar ada lecturer/cigu yang sanggup stay after working hours untuk mengajar, let alone sampai mengajar ke tengah tengah malam buta? You could noticed that she had a reaaaaallly long day, but she still stayed with us sampai abis. I hope kalau aku jadi cigu karang, aku bukan jadi jenis cigunya yang MaGaBu. In other words, I want to inherit sensei's will of fire. haha.

Anyhow, it will be my final exam IN UBD. Wish me luck, although I doubt i could pass. Kalau dapat pun, I think the score would be low. But it's ok, after restu sensei, lega juga hati mendangar ya kata lau ku fail pun nda pa, sebab kita belajar dalam masa 4 hari saja. memang record tu mun ku dapat high marks. hehe. After tomorrow, I'm off to Yahoohoo land.

So i take my leave here; Oyasuminasai!

WONDERFOOL people :P

I'm just glad to have met these people... Wherever you are, whoever you are, whatever you are, whyever you are, whenever you are, whoseever you are and however you are (Ignore the lameness), I just want to thank you for being a part of my life. :)

Me & sarin! Jangan hairan haha Kami 2 andang selahau

Me & Teo. Apa lah kabar anak ane? bermuscle kali sudah haha

Me and Hakutaro-niisan. Kira my best bud di hostel lah tu...

Gambar time Sarin burfday: notice aku nda pandai senyum dulu atu haha

From l->r: Eyan, Mumui, Mena, Dayang & Dyane

HnF: DC

top: Jujai & Yul

2nd From top: Zhaf, Akio-kun & Aniki

3rd from top: Pipudin & Me

Bottom: Hani, Gibby, Amal, Hana & Piyah

Bakal artis Brunei haha: Najib paris hilton & Me

Itu dia, zaman Resco dulu... Kami ane digelar, puak Dusun haha

Najib junior, Lucy and me

Me, Nanami-chan and Hikari-chan. Japanese speech contest dulu

Me, Tajul (Prince metrosexy) & Jabilin (Butler perampas)

Me, Zana'riah' & Apip

Me & Da.Da (Perempuan yang paling pertama saya tegur di Form 1) haha

Great friends from outside Brunei:

l->r: Rota (Laos), Nan (Laos), Ling Min (Perak), Helen (Sabah) & me

Roel (Australia), me & Nan! I miss them so much

Last kali, group free radicals awww. Fadma, Matt, Safiana, Hamni & me.

I feel loved with 'em. haha. Sekiranya ada urg2 yang saya termiss, jgn kecil hati, sesungguhnya kamu bukan disayangi. Eyh salah, sesungguhnya aku nada pic kamu or kamu nda sayang aku. hahaha kidding.

V(-- v --)V Double peace